Why me?

Lent has passed along with the first week of Easter and my heart has been consistently anxious.  It feels as if my training wheels have been taken off and I am to put into practice all I have learned over the past 40 days to make my ride successful but I will admit, it has not been.  Easter morning, the Lord hit me with an amazing challenge and instead of pulling out all my notes, trusting in him, and gracefully excepting, I shifted my focus, became subject to fear and fell flat on my face. Still, I am fighting discouragement, depression, and asking for a way out of this glorious opportunity that he has placed upon me.  I suppose this is what Moses felt like when God told him he was to go talk with the Pharaoh (and in just typing those words, humility hits, tears blur my vision, and I can't seem to draw in a full breath of air.)  I am so scared.  "Me, Lord?  Why not her, or him, anyone but me?"  Now Isaiah is flooding my memory.  "Here I am Lord, send me."  That should be my attitude.  For what greater, dangerous, amazing thing can be done than that of what God calls you to?  There isn't one.  The possibilities of hurt are endless but even greater is God's ability to use me and heal what has been broken.  During this time, God has placed a song in my heart that I must share.  It has played none stop in my ears, giving me encouragement and I hope it does the same for you all as well.

 Jesus, please come*
Please come today
Hear me
Heal me
Be near me I pray

I have fallen so far
Flat on my face
I'm in need of your grace today
I stumble and fall
But in spite of it all
Your love always stays the same
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Jesus, please come
Please come today
Break me
Mold me
Use me I pray

But don't give up on me now
I'm so close to you now
I'm in need of your grace today
Wipe the dirt off my face
Hold me in your embrace
Your love always saves the day
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

I have fallen so far
Flat on my face
I'm in need of your grace today
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Sing Hallelujah
Sing Hallelujah
Sing Hallelujah amen

On my knees here I fall
In spite of it all
Hallelujah
And though it seems hard
I'm still trusting you Lord
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Please answer this prayer Lord, that I may have the courage to do what you have asked, walk in your love and Fear not!